How to say no part 1: Rejecting and receiving rejection

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Rejection isn’t easy for anyone because it leaves most people feeling unworthy and hurt. Both men and women are generally terrible at receiving it and even worse at giving it. But rejection is a necessary step towards establishing or maintaining healthy boundaries and a healthy sex life.

Why don’t we ever put ourselves in anyone else’s shoes? We hate rejection but we never stop to imagine the effect our own words have on others. It’s usually scathing and we have no idea.

It’s critical that we honor each other’s boundaries when we hear no, but there’s so much more to it than that.

How do we distinguish between no, maybe, I’m curious, not yet, and a hard stop? How do we lovingly communicate this to our partners and how can we hear it without losing our minds? This subject is so vast we have spread it out over four parts. This is Part I.

Note: It is extremely important to honor someone’s boundaries and meet them where they are. We do not encourage pushing past anyone’s no. We do however encourage gentle communication, questions and authentic discussion on the subject so that we can understand each other and move closer to love.


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